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July 2001 |
Sunday 1st
Happy Birthday Jamie, 11 today.
The picture was taken last week at a "before I returned to Thailand pre party for Jamie and me" ... if you were wondering. England last weekend, Australia next weekend... what a life!
Monday 2nd
These last three days of the school year are "curriculum extension week". The normal timetable ceases in favour of more unusual activities. This morning the Year 12 students were taken to the local park for a whodunnit game. Here are the instructions they received:
A terrible crime has been committed. Someone has been sneaking into the school kitchens and eating the cakes. This has been going on for some weeks but the culprit has now been seen by a number of people. These witnesses have indicated that it is a teacher but are not prepared to name the guilty party. They will however give out clues to those people who can solve their problems.
Your mission is to stroll around Rama IX Park and find the witnesses. You should engage them in conversation and determine their problem. If you can solve this problem successfully you will be given a clue. Collect as many clues as you can before the 10:20 deadline.
Use the clues to work out which teacher is the main suspect. Write their name on the back of this sheet and draw a cartoon of them caught in action. A very desirable prize will be awarded for the best team effort.
1. Do not leave the park
2. Ensure that you are back on the bus by 10:20am at the very latest
3. Don’t talk to strangers
4. Do talk to strange people who match the descriptions of the “witnesses”
The witnesses:
Johhny Pilchard …. Shifty Looking fisherman
Claire Cookaburra …. Waitress in Café
Gary Greenfinger … The watchful gardener
Rev John Pulpit … The cycling vicar
Lynne Tweetfull …. An enthusiastic ornithologist
Martin Asprin …. Juvenile Delinquent
Mike Lyeing …. Who never tells the truth
Heiress Heather … A wealthy widow
Professor Besoidiss … Genius or Lunatic?Needless to say that the witnesses were all the Maths teachers... I was the cycling vicar.
Eavening meal at "Annas Cafe" with the afore mentioned witnesses!
Tuesday 3rd
Received from Sowi:
> Comprehending Engineers - Take One:
Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said "where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want."
The second engineer nodded approvingly, 'Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."Wednesday 4th
Last day of the school year. Two big assemblies today saying goodbye to leaving staff. Sad to see people who came out originally on the same flight as me have now finished their time in Thailand and are returning to the UK. Some very funny speeches and touching moments. In six weeks time there will be new staff nervously boarding that flight from Heathrow, not sure what lies ahead of them and the adventures will start all over again.
Thursday 5th
I went into McDonalds for lunch. I placed my order then was asked to start a 60 second stopwatch on the counter. They had a special offer on today, if they couldn't serve you within 60s you got a free drink.
One way of comparing the cost of living in different countries is to look at the cost of a Big Mac converted into pounds. By today's exchange rates:
USA £1.73 UK £1.90 Thailand 81p Japan £1.69 Australia 98p Glad it's Australia I'm flying to on Saturday!
Friday 6th
Mark and Emma (recently wed) are guests for dinner.
7th till 21st .... Australia
DOWN UNDER
Well Shep was right. I really did enjoy Australia... and far more than I thought I would too. I really don't have time to write up all my adventures there but the key points (which might mean something to some people) would be, in no particular order:
Melbourne ==> Sydney ==> Darwin
Kangaroos in the wild
"Mamamia!" on stage in Melbourne
Opera House
Blue Mountains
Katoomba Youth Hostel
2' long Lizard
Cycling in Darwin
"Singing in the Rain" on stage in Sydney
Sydney Scout's Gang Show
Friendly Australians
Bondi Beach
I was with six other teachers on a course in Melbourne, Sak joined me in Sydney then I was on my own in Darwin. Instead of taking pictures I used my digital video camera. I edited the Sydney bit of the video for Sak's friends and family. It looks great ... It won't come out too well over the Internet but click here to get a rough idea of what it looked like.
Sunday 22nd
Saw the film "Shrek". What an excellent production. Technically brilliant and hilariously funny too. There's hope for all us ugly people yet!
Monday 23rd
Someone sent me the following. I can't remember who it was but I think they'll probably want to remain nameless anyway:
in the home.At the 1999 World Women's Conference the debate was the role of the sexes
The first speaker from Canada stood up:
"At last year's conference we spoke about being more assertive with our husbands. Well, after the conference I went home and told my husband that I would no longer cook for him and that he would have to do it himself. After the first day I saw nothing. After the second day I saw nothing. But after the third day I saw that he had cooked a wonderful roast lamb." The crowd cheered.
The second speaker from France stood up: "After last year's Conference I went home and told my husband that I would no longer do his laundry and that he would have to do it himself. After the first day I saw nothing. After the second day I saw nothing. But after the third day I saw that he had done not only his own washing but my washing as well." The crowd cheered.
The third speaker from Glasgow stood up: "Efter last year's Conference ah went hame and tellt ma man that I widnae dae his cookin', cleanin' or shoppin' and that he wid hiftae dae it himsel. Efter the first day ah saw nuhin'. Efter the second day ah saw nuhin' But efter the third day I could see a wee bit oot o ma lef eye.
Tuesday 24th
This clever online sleight of hand will leave you gobsmacked until you work out how its done, after which you'll feel used, abused and dirty.
Wednesday 25th
Went into school to check my post, it was like a ghost town, only Kim and the builders working. The new Maths classrooms are nearly finished... amazing.
On a spur of spontaneity I headed of to Pattaya for a couple of days. I checked into the Woodlands Hotel (only 1000 baht without breakfast) and had a late night walk around the bright lights.
Sharky, the first bar on the right as you enter Walking Street, is a good evenings entertainment. Nice surroundings with a fun band.
Thursday 26th
Lazy day by the pool reading John Grisham's "A Painted House". Lunch of pork schnitzel at a German restaurant, Dinner of Hungarian Goulash at a fantastic international restaurant called "Bruno's: right behind the bowling alley.
$ $ $
$ $
Friday 27th
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Back to Bangkok by bus with a lunatic driver. 100 km, 1 hr 25 mins, 37 near misses but what can you expect for only 90 baht (£1.40). Every time I get on one of those busses I always witness the same confusion as passengers try to find their seats from the numbers on their tickets. The seat numbers are on the back of the headrests so it is never clear whether they refer to the seat in front or behind. It always breaks the ice though. |
Bless Mark and Emma. I bought them a gift voucher, well a meal voucher actually, for dinner in the Imperial Queen's Park Hotel when they came here for their honeymoon. They forgot to bring the voucher with them when they came so today I received it in the post. I enjoyed their honeymoon dinner... excellent. Then a couple of pints of Guinness and an excellent band in "The Doublinner".
Saturday 28th
Spent the whole day using "Premiere" to edit some of the digital video I took in Sydney (See Australia entry above). It's addictive and so time consuming. The weather is fantastic outside but I haven't been out to appreciate it. Must get out tomorrow.
Sunday 29th
As it's a Sunday here's a secular story:
On their way to get married, a young couple are involved in a fatal car accident. The couple find themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven. While waiting, they begin to wonder: Could they possibly get married in Heaven?
When St. Peter shows up, they asked him. St. Peter says, "I don't know.This is the first time anyone has asked. Let me go find out," and he leaves.The couple sat and waited for an answer. . . . . .for a couple of months.While they waited, they discussed that IF they were allowed to get married in Heaven, SHOULD they get married, what with the eternal aspect of it all."What if it doesn't work?" they wondered, "Are we stuck together FOREVER?"
After yet another month, St. Peter finally returns, looking somewhat bedraggled. "Yes," he informs the couple, "you CAN get married in Heaven."
"Great!" said the couple, "But we were just wondering, what if things don't work out? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven?" St. Peter, red-faced with anger, slams his clipboard onto the ground.
"What's wrong?" asked the frightened couple.
"OH, COME ON!!" St. Peter shouts, "It took me three months to find a priest up here! Do you have ANY idea how long it'll take me to find a lawyer?
Monday 30th
At last I've sacked the maid. She was just taking too many days off without letting me know. The landlord's promised to buy me a washing machine. I need to learn how to wash clothes now!!
Tuesday 31st
Spent the day in school sorting out my new office. It will be over three weeks before most of the other teachers come back but I need to get a headstart.
Very pleased with the Maths IB results. Particularly pleased with my (small) group. Two sixes and a seven. Well done Sra, Maaike and Rin On.
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